Reply
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
 
Old 01-13-2012, 10:27 AM   #11
Bus Crazy
 
Accordion's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2011
Location: Central Tennessee
Posts: 1,093
Year: 1973
Coachwork: Blue Bird
Chassis: All American
Engine: CAT 1160 V-8 Diesel
Rated Cap: 72
Re: Time to laugh

I am really looking forward to hear some more funny stories. Just think back. I know that there are some hilarious moments in all of your lives.

Here is another from me. A true story.


There was a very fancy restaurant in Woodstock, called the Bald Hill. It was the kind of place where you wore a suit and tie to go dine. Glen, the guitarist and singer, and John, the bass player, were hired to play the one time a year that the restaurant had live music.

That was the week before Christmas. Every year there would be a third member of the band invited to play. One year, it was my turn to play guitar and sing with them.

We got paid well and as a bonus, we were invited to each bring a guest and have a dinner a few weeks later. I had invited a girlfriend as both Glen and John had.

We went to the place, and actually got dressed up better than we were when we played the gig. The restaurant was packed (as always). I ordered roast duck. It came with au gratin pototoes and peas.

I must say now that the peas are the center of this story. So, everyone has their meal in front of them now, and there are a few bottles of wine on the table as well. We begin eating and enjoying the high life.

Well, being the jokester that I am, I get this real fun idea. I think to myself, how far could I launch a pea with a spoon? Naturally, I did not tell anyone at the table of my plans. So I begin my aerial attack.

I load a pea onto a spoon and fling it discreetly. It was fun to see them flying through the air. I was aiming at people. It took ten minutes, however, before I connected.

Finally, I hit a target. Here is this old guy in a tuxedo enjoying a wonderful meal with his family and grandchildren, when out of nowhere a green pea hits him on the cheek and explodes in a green mush.

I must say that that is probably the funniest thing I have ever seen. Of course, no one at my table knew anything about it. It is a shame that I could not share with them my fun game.

I knew if I told them, they would give me away just by the mere fact that they would have been looking and laughing. Of course I laughed at the whole thing, but nobody knew what I was laughing at.
__________________
Best Home Yet - Strong Command Center --- viewtopic.php?f=9&t=10764
Accordion is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 01-15-2012, 10:10 AM   #12
Bus Crazy
 
Accordion's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2011
Location: Central Tennessee
Posts: 1,093
Year: 1973
Coachwork: Blue Bird
Chassis: All American
Engine: CAT 1160 V-8 Diesel
Rated Cap: 72
Re: Time to laugh

I am looking forward to read some stories from our members. I will post some more of mine soon.
For now, here is one from Anonymous:

The Perfect Husband
Several men are in the locker room of a golf club.
A cell phone on a bench rings and a man engages the hands
free speaker-function and begins to talk..
Everyone else in the room stops to listen.
MAN: "Hello."
WOMAN: "Honey, it's me. Are you at the club?"
MAN: "Yes."
WOMAN: "I am at the mall now and found this beautiful
leather coat. It's only $1,000. Is it OK if I buy
it?"
MAN: "Sure, go ahead if you like it that much."
WOMAN: "I also stopped by the Mercedes dealership and
saw the new 2009 models. I saw one I really liked."
MAN: "How much?"
WOMAN: "$140,000."
MAN: "OK, but for that price, I want it with all the options."
WOMAN: "Great! Oh, and one more thing
......the house I wanted last year is back on the market.
They're asking $950,000."
MAN: "Well, then go ahead and give them an offer
of
$900,000. They will probably take it. If not, we can go the
extra 50 thousand. It is really a pretty good price."
WOMAN: "OK. I'll see you later!I love you so much!!"
MAN: "Bye! I love you, too."
The man hangs up. The other men in the locker room are
staring at him in astonishment, mouths agape.....
Then he smiles and asks: "Anyone know who this phone
belongs to?"
__________________
Best Home Yet - Strong Command Center --- viewtopic.php?f=9&t=10764
Accordion is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 01-15-2012, 10:17 AM   #13
Bus Crazy
 
Accordion's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2011
Location: Central Tennessee
Posts: 1,093
Year: 1973
Coachwork: Blue Bird
Chassis: All American
Engine: CAT 1160 V-8 Diesel
Rated Cap: 72
Re: Time to laugh

Another one from dburt who is one of our members:


My brother had mice in his bedroom one time, and he could not catch them! Thier noise at night bothered him, and he was upset that it seemed nothing could be done. Someone had given me an old BB pistol, it looked like an old Colt single action. It was not accurate, but it was fun to plink with, since you never knew what you were going to hit with it.

In an unguarded burst of bravado, I told him I would take care of the mouse problem, just let me know the next time he saw it. Later that day he came and got me, and told me it was sitting in a corner of the room chewing on something. I quietly went in the room behind him and sure 'nuff, there sat the 'onery varmit, brazen as a floosie at church. I was just being cocky, but I told him I would drill him between the eyes!

I cocked the old BB gun and let fly- and I will be hornswoggled if I did not drill that poor little critter right between the eyes!! Of course my brother thought I was really a dead shot, and I did not want to disappoint him by telling him the truth!

Soon after that, I figured out a way to catch fireflies and put them in a small bottle in my pocket. If you take a firefly and pinch thier rear end where the glow comes from, it will cause the glow part to really flare up in a nice bright glow for a few seconds before the poor bug expires.

I also discovered that you could load one of the half dead fireflys butt first down the barrell of the old BB gun, and launch him out the barrell with the BB you were shooting. The BB would hit the bug in the butt and cause the glowpart to glow brightly as it shot the bug out of the barrell at high speed. Hmmm- I see the workings of a good joke coming on here- the old lite bulb in the noggin came on to have a little fun with my dad!

I told my dad I could shoot fireflies right out of the sky at night with the old BB gun. Of course this sounded utterly absurd to my dad, and he said he had to see this. So I caught some fireflies and put them in the bottle in my pocket, and told my dad to come outside and watch. Since it was dark, and he could not see what I was doing, I would load a firefly in the barrell and then tell my dad to watch "that firefly over there". Of course there were hundereds of fireflys flying around, so it was impossible to tell which one I was supposedly pointing at. Then I would shoot the BB gun, the poor doomed firefly came out with his butt glowing brightly from being hit with the BB. After the BB and the firefly parted company a ways out, the firefly would come drifting down in a death spiral glowing brightly and it appeared I had actually shot it out of the air. My dad was very impressed, I was doing what appeared to be the impossible, which it really was. I would shot one firefly after the other out of the air.

I even got so cocky as to tell my dad I could shoot them out of the air over my shoulder backwards without looking. Of course this really amazed him. And that's how the legend of Dead Eye DB started!
dburt
__________________
Best Home Yet - Strong Command Center --- viewtopic.php?f=9&t=10764
Accordion is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 01-16-2012, 11:14 AM   #14
Bus Nut
 
TheRainbowBoxer's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2011
Location: Galion, OH
Posts: 290
Year: 1995
Coachwork: Bluebird
Chassis: TC2000
Engine: 5.9 Cummins 12v
Rated Cap: 78 Passenger
Re: Time to laugh

Here's one I heard a while ago-

A man arrives at the pearly gates and St. Peter asks him what his story is.
He said:
"I came home from work early and founds my wife undressed in bed.
She claims she just got out of the shower, but I checked the shower and it was dry.
I searched all over the apartment and finally found a man hanging from the balcony.
I pounded on the man's hands until he fell, but a hedge row broke his 6 story fall enough that he survived.
In a fit of furious rage, I picked up the cedar chest from the end of the bed and dropped it out the window onto the man.
I had a massive heart attack at that point and dropped dead."

St. Peter tells the man to move on into the next room for further processing and asks the next man in line to relate his story.
He said:
"It was the worst day ever. I was working on the air conditioning on the roof of an apartment, when I tripped and fell.
I toppled over the edge of the roof and miraculously caught the railing on the sixth floor.
At this point a crazy man came running out onto the balcony and pounded on my hands until I fell.
I landed in a hedge, seriously injured, but still alive. I looked up to see the man push a cedar chest out of the window.
I tried to crawl out of the way, but it landed on me and killed me."

St. Peter sends the second man on his way, and shaking his head asks the next guy to come in.
Peter says with an ironic smile "sorry I'm a little out of sorts with the stories of the last 2 fellows, I don't imagine your story can top them."

The man says:
"Well, here I was, hiding buck naked in a cedar chest......"
__________________
-Dan

"What's the matter Col Sanders? Chicken?" -Dark Helmet

lu·di·crous [loo-di-kruhs]
adjective
causing laughter because of absurdity; provoking or deserving derision; ridiculous; laughable

viewtopic.php?f=9&t=11840
TheRainbowBoxer is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 01-16-2012, 11:29 AM   #15
Site Team
 
bansil's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2011
Location: MNT CITY TN
Posts: 5,046
Re: Time to laugh

__________________
Our build La Tortuga
Accept the challenges so that you can feel the exhilaration of victory.
George S. Patton
bansil is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 01-16-2012, 01:56 PM   #16
Bus Crazy
 
Accordion's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2011
Location: Central Tennessee
Posts: 1,093
Year: 1973
Coachwork: Blue Bird
Chassis: All American
Engine: CAT 1160 V-8 Diesel
Rated Cap: 72
Re: Time to laugh

Funny stuff. I am gonna save my other personal stories for later.

BUT, here is one of my favorite cheerleader cheers:

Rah rah ree, kick them in the knee.
Rah rah rass, kick them in the other knee.
__________________
Best Home Yet - Strong Command Center --- viewtopic.php?f=9&t=10764
Accordion is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 01-16-2012, 07:50 PM   #17
Bus Crazy
 
Join Date: Mar 2011
Location: Oregon/Philippines
Posts: 1,660
Re: Time to laugh

will now go and check my wife's cedar chest.
__________________
Jesus Christ... Conversion in progress.
chev49 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 01-20-2012, 11:46 AM   #18
Bus Crazy
 
Accordion's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2011
Location: Central Tennessee
Posts: 1,093
Year: 1973
Coachwork: Blue Bird
Chassis: All American
Engine: CAT 1160 V-8 Diesel
Rated Cap: 72
Re: Time to laugh

Gee, either very few people read this section of the forum, or very few people got into as much mischief as I did in my youth.

In the interest of furthering this thread, here is another story. I've got lots of them.



Even into our teenage years. My Mom made my brother and I go to church on Sundays. It was a two mile walk. On the days that my Mom did not accompany us, my brother and I would do some fun things. Of course, my Mom would always ask us if we went to church that day. We did go, because we didn't want to tell a lie.

One of the fun things was to go in to the crawl space under the church and hang out there. We noticed that, because it was an old building, we could hear what was going on inside the church.

So I got this idea.

One Sunday we brought a hydraulic car jack with us. We stashed it in the entrance to the crawl space, then went inside and waited for the priest's sermon to begin.

That is also when the fun was to begin.

During the sermon, everyone is seated. My brother and I had already scoped out an area where there were a lot of old folks sitting.

So, we sneak out of the church, and go into the crawl space. We gathered up a few rocks from under there and place the jack on top of them and onto a floor joist.

Then we start jacking up slowly. After raising the floor perhaps two inches, we hear a woman exclaim to someone who was sitting next to her, "did you feel that"?

I can imagine just how perplexed the woman must have been. At this point, we slowed down the jacking up process.

Eventually, we had jacked up the floor at least four inches, and things started to creak.

We could here her mumbling about this strangeness that was happening.

Well, now for the funnest part. We opened the valve of the jack so that it came down very quickly. It was then that she let out such a scream that the whole congregation, including the priest's sermon went quiet.

Of course, we didn't get caught, but my mom was upset that our clothes had gotten dirty. I told her that we fell on the ground. Almost true. we actually crawled on the ground.
__________________
Best Home Yet - Strong Command Center --- viewtopic.php?f=9&t=10764
Accordion is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 01-22-2012, 02:01 PM   #19
Bus Crazy
 
Diesel Dan's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2009
Location: Austin, TX
Posts: 1,489
Year: 1996
Coachwork: Thomas
Chassis: International
Engine: DT466/AT545
Re: Time to laugh

Man, you are too much!
__________________
Gallery:
http://www.skoolie.net/gallery/v/Skooli ... l_dan_bus/
Conversion Thread:
viewtopic.php?t=4959
Diesel Dan is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 01-28-2012, 01:46 PM   #20
Bus Crazy
 
Join Date: Mar 2011
Location: Oregon/Philippines
Posts: 1,660
Re: Time to laugh

You could have also switched the rest room signs on Easter Sunday like we did...
__________________
Jesus Christ... Conversion in progress.
chev49 is offline   Reply With Quote
Reply

Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are Off
Pingbacks are Off
Refbacks are Off


Similar Threads
Thread Thread Starter Forum Replies Last Post
Second time around newbusser Skoolie Conversion Projects 26 03-19-2015 10:49 PM
Once Upon A Time timbuk Everything Else | General Skoolie Discussions 0 05-06-2010 08:06 PM
Who wants a laugh? Abbott Everything Else | General Skoolie Discussions 1 04-16-2010 02:52 AM
Laugh for the day crazycal Everything Else | General Skoolie Discussions 0 02-16-2009 10:51 PM
Time to chime in... vtwinmotors Conversion General Discussions 5 01-04-2009 12:08 PM

» Virginia Campgrounds

Reviews provided by

Powered by vBadvanced CMPS v3.2.3

All times are GMT -5. The time now is 05:17 AM.


Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.8 Beta 4
Copyright ©2000 - 2017, vBulletin Solutions, Inc.